Side Effects

Don't you just love those medication commercials?  Someone is walking through a meadow while a soothing voice explains the side effects to the miraculous drug that fixes your every problem.  A butterfly floats down onto the meadow walkers hand and the voice says "possible side effects include... mood swings, loss of appetite, horrible gas, and anal leakage.  Oh, but you don't pay any attention to that stuff because now the walker is laying next to a rainbow with puppies in their lap while a unicorn gallops in the background.  What side effects?

I have been trying to pay attention to the side effects of the R-CHOP chemo treatment I receive. Each one has it's downfalls but I am trying to find the good in them as well.  Here is a list that I have compiled at this point (1/3 of the way through).

1.  Hair loss-  Bad: People look at you strangely or with sadness in their eyes, they know
                       something is up but don't know what it is exactly.
                       Hats are hot when the weather doesn't cooperate with the calendar.
                       Good: No shaving!  My bathroom time is cut in half, not having to shave, shampoo,
                       condition, blow dry, and style. Not to mention the money saved on haircuts and color.

  Look at me saving all kinds of money on hair care products!

2. Change in taste- Bad/Good Things I usually like taste weird.  What I have eaten during my chemo

                                 treatment makes we want to gag after it's over.  I ate almonds and cherries my

                                 first time and I cannot even think of eating them now.  I always snacked on

                                 almonds.  After my first chemo all I wanted to eat was McDonald's (yuck and

                                 not the best choice) I think it was because I could taste it.  So I ate it during my

                                 my second treatment...Guess what I don't want anymore.  It's a win, win!

3. Mouth Sores-Bad: My mouth is drier than a popcorn fart for about 2 weeks following

                           chemo.  My tongue is swollen and white.  The back of my throat burns.  I bite the

                           insides of my cheeks and get sores.

                           Good: Only cold things feel good in my mouth.  Water does not cut it, so milkshakes

                           sherbet, Popsicles, and ice cream it is. 

4. Chemo-Brain- Bad: I'm not sure there is a good to this one.  It's often called a fog.  I have noticed
                              I am forgetting words.  I love words!  Vocabulary is fun for me and I can't seem
                              to remember simple words I always use.  My attention span seems to be shorter
                              or maybe I'm just bored. I get dizzy easy too.  Sometimes just turning my head too
                              fast will make me want to take a seat.

5. Tired, tired, tired- Bad: I can't do everything I want to do.  I like projects and staying busy.
                                    Good: Naps are awesome!

I'm sure the list will grow with each treatment and everyday changes.  I'm just glad at this point this is I am dealing with.  Prayers for those who suffer much more than I.